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Thursday, August 23, 2007

Do you ever have days like this? Where you are the kitten – and the rest of the world the Border Collie?

Well, I’ve had about a week of days like that. Nothing has gone right. You know the kind -- everyone wants to take a bite out of you, so like this kitten, you rear back, tell them all to back off—only to have someone smack you in the teeth for it.

Sigh. I won’t bore you with the details of my work situation. Suffice to say I know my job – I’m good at what I do and I damn well know it. Someone stepped on my toes and when I warned her to back off, she got nasty. I didn’t sink to her level but let her know in no uncertain terms that I was the superior here and she wasn’t going to push me around. Guess who got slapped on the hand for that one? Not her!

Some of you know about my dad’s illness and that dealing with my mother’s many issues during the illness has been a challenge. Well having a sister who consistently leaves ME to deal with my mother during all of this is no picnic either. But my mother and sister are exactly alike in that they’re both ridiculously self centered and selfish with no concern for anyone but themselves. So of course that conversation got turned into a “you just don’t know how stressful my life is right now.” Uh huh. Yeah, must be rough taking all those vacations and having plenty of “down time”. So that was the second battle.

Third is the non-stop kids battle. Gone are those idyllic lazy days of early summer. In place is the restlessness that comes from having the luxury of doing “nothing”. They go back to school in just under two weeks and I think they’re ready for routine and schedules again. I probably am too.

Anyway, so that’s my mood for today. One of those days where a hot fudge sundae for lunch would probably help – if only my stomach weren’t in knots from all the stress and angst.

For now, the in-laws are due soon to take the boys for the day. Never been too crazy about the ol’ IL’s, but this summer they’ve earned my gratitude. Having one day a week to myself has been a real sanity saver. Whether I spend it cleaning, working, writing – or simply lounging on my favorite couch “recharging my battery” by watching reruns of Frasier or Meg Ryan movies I’ve seen a thousand times before, it helps.

First on my list is a long walk with an old friend who always has an ear when I’m feeling down. Yeah, he gulps his food and drools and prefers to take his half of the bed out of the middle and has the worst habit of chasing squirrels…. But time spent with him always manages to lift my spirits. And to think they call dogs man’s best friend! Hah!


Paty Jager said...

I hope you figure out whether this is worth the turmoil and angst. I'm not sure if they know or care that if you go, I go as well. And I'm not sure how I'd feel about someone else editing my books after leaving, but we'll see what happens.

Here's to a good regrouping day and finding what you want to do- and yeah- You are good at what you do! And don't let anyone tell you any different!!

Nicole McCaffrey said...

Thanks. You're the best -- have I told you that lately?

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